Quotes from The Preacher's Life


Mrs. Avery to Thurgood: "The way I see it, you can join in our group and thank Jesus in prayer, or you can interrupt us one more time and thank him in person."

Juicy: "He looks like he sees something. I bet it's ham. I get that smile when I see ham."

Thurgood: "I have broken at least a dozen of the ten commandments."

Reverend: "Your soul's not clean until it's zestfully clean."

Thurgood: "Sorry, that's one of the seven silent but deadly sins."

Thurgood: "Well, I finished the bible."
Muriel: "In one night?"
Thurgood: "Well, like King James, I finished it on the throne too."

Thurgood: "Hey, Muriel, does God do three-way calling?"

Thurgood: "I have tasted of the water of which when you drink it, you're never thirsty again."
Smokey: "Are you crazy? You're supposed to cut that with something. We've got to get you to an emergency room!"
Thurgood: "No, I'm talking about the love of God."

Muriel: "Thurgood Stubbs, you better check yourself before you wreck yourself. Pride goeth before a fall."

Thurgood: "Now if you'll excuse me, I have an appointment with near-death."

Mrs. Avery: "It's about time they put some good old fashioned pain back into religion."

Thurgood: "I myself have become more and more like Jesus Christ. I mean, look at all the parallel signs. He was the lamb of God, God I like eating lamb. He had those twelve apostles, I had those twelve jurors. He hung out with a hooker named Mary, I hung out with a hooker named... uh, ah, anyway, he was a carpenter, I was a carpenter."

Walter: "Let's get ready to humbleeeeeeeee."

Calvin: "Aha! Now we got a ball of death happening!"

Mrs. Avery: "Hurry up and turn the other cheek so I can hit you on that one too."

Muriel: "Thurgood, did it every occur to you that what God wants is for you to just shut up?"


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